Last week I got two proposals. One on Tuesday, and the other on Friday. One was a hand down, from my cousin. She called me to explain that a guy had come for her hand, and she wasn’t interested, but because he was such a good catch she thought I should have him. Now my cousin isn’t the type of person to do anything from the kindness of her heart. She was sending me her second hand in the hopes that I would agree to meeting him, just so she can sit at my wedding (hypothetically) and say with a smirk that he had come for her hand first. The second guy on Friday was a tax driver. A friend of a friend, whom had seen my pictures and fallen in love. He was described to me as tall, dark, and handsome. What I saw was hairy, big nose, and bald. But that’s besides the point. I was told by my mother I should be lucky that not ONE but TWO guys had shown their interest in me. Because at 26, I am expired and apparently so are my eggs.